Ju-dee, Ju-dee, Ju-dee

Whew, it's a good thing Rudy Guiliani hates him some brown people. Otherwise, those Red State "true murrcans" he's busy trying to woo might realize . . . he ain't exactly one of them:

Today she and Giuliani, when they are not boarding private Gulfstream IV jets to Europe or trying to woo voters, shuttle between a $4 million Hamptons house and a $5 million nine-room Upper East Side apartment near Madison Avenue, its dining room walnut-paneled and crammed with crystal, china, and linen from Scully & Scully. Her annual salary has also improved: $125,000, evidently for helping to write some of the speeches Giuliani likes to give (for which he received $11.7 million between January 2006 and March 2007). This comes as a surprise to at least one of Judith's acquaintances. Asked if he knew Judith was writing speeches, one former Giuliani aide replied, "Holy cow! God forbid!"
The details of Judith's life have also undergone some refurbishing. Her monogrammed hand-stitched napkins embraced by thick silver napkin rings are on display, along with the new cigar room designed for her husband, and a mantelpiece adorned with white porcelain figurines of Winston Churchill, the statesman with whom Giuliani likes to invite comparison. She struck an odalisque pose in Hamptonstyle magazine, and appeared robed in a floor-length burgundy gown by Carolina Herrera on the cover of Avenue magazine, whose editorial director, Pamela Gross, accompanies her frequently, especially when TV cameras are present. ("Never get between Pamela, Judith, and a camera," advises one observer.) Judith sits in the front rows of fashion shows, her hair freshly styled by a full-time assistant lured from Frédéric Fekkai, and, when asked to pose, thrusts out an obliging hip for the cameras. Although she informed WWD, "I have no room for shopping in my life," she buys Dolce & Gabbana.

Oh, and Rudy doesn't get that "mayor of murrica" thing he's campaigning for, maybe he's got a shot at Father Asshole of the Year:

The mayor began to spend his weekends—accompanied, as the New York Post reported, by a detail of detectives, which may have cost taxpayers $3,000 a tryst—in Southampton, where Judith owned a condominium. Since he had until then always accounted for his weekends, says the incisive Giuliani biographer Wayne Barrett, "his press office started telling reporters, 'He's teaching Andrew how to play golf.' Now, Andrew's old enough to understand—he has to be aware that his father used him as a beard!"

He was not present, they say, at Andrew's graduation from St. Joseph Regional High School in New Jersey. Now 21 and a Duke University junior, the son tells friends he doesn't speak to Rudy, according to one of his classmates—this at a time when his father is desperate to attract conservative, family-values backing. . . . At Caroline's recent graduation, from New York's Trinity School, Rudy and Judith sat in the last row of the balcony and left 10 minutes before the two-hour ceremony ended.!"

Is it any wonder his kids don't speak to him?

Well, at least Saint Rudy wouldn't besmirch his public service by getting laid on the people's dime like that darned Slick Willy. . . oh, wait. . .

>

The mayor began to spend his weekends—accompanied, as the New York Post reported, by a detail of detectives, which may have cost taxpayers $3,000 a tryst—in Southampton, where Judith owned a condominium.

And let's see if we hear the same volume and intensity of criticism from those same Catholic windbags (including some Bishops) who went after John Kerry in 2004.

Then again, moral, intellectual or principled consistency never was the rightwing's strong-suit.

Pat Robertson thinks Giuliani is just peachy, "a dear friend and a great leader".